Lonely celebrities, Mumbai Mirror

All those lonely people
by Subhash K Jha

It's a very real, very tangible and terrible dilemma. To be a super-successful and marriageable showbiz celebrity is like looking at a life of ceaseless bachelorhood and loneliness. Sounds really awful…but that's the truth."Who will I marry?" Ekta Kapoor often says, whenever I act the concerned elder brother. She is 30 and ready to marry. And she has a point. How can we even begin to imagine a suitable groom's existence for television's resident tycoon? We first have to look at Ekta's success ( gasp!) , then her bank balance (gasp, gasp) and then her inability to sublimate her ego in a marital situation. And that's precisely what has happened with most of super-successful heroines down the years. Barring a Saira Banu, Nargis (who by the way, epitomises the understated beauty of a marriage on the rebound) or Sharmila Tagore, none of the actresses I know, or not know, has been in a successful marriage……Or even a marriage. "Whom could I have married?" Asha Parekh echoes Ekta. "I was a nice maiden . But I was never an ice maiden. Of course I had a man in my life. But marriage was impossible. I couldn't settle for some successful star-struck Gujju from my community who would have been worshipping the ground beneath my feet when all I'd want was for him to worship our alliance."Marriages between fans and stars are a sure journey into disaster zone. Do you remember poor Mukesh Aggarwal? He married the diva Rekha briefly. The brief wedding ended in grief with Mukesh hanging himself with his wife's dupatta.So what do all my 30-plus friends do? While Raveena after much of a search for the sach is happily-married, Urmila says she wants me to find her someone in Patna. Ekta has all but given up the thought of marriage. Sushmita wants marriage too. I want it for her too. I've promised to sit on the mandap and do her kanyadaan along with her dad. But who on earth would dare to marry the stunning Sen? And I use the word 'dare' with much care. Elsewhere marriages might be made in heaven. In filmdom they are charted by far more pragmatic circumstances. Is the spouse as successful in his own field as his star wife? Even if he is, how do we guarantee that he won't feel left out when she's busy being mobbed or just facing the camera?It happened with the Saif-Rosa relationship. He would be out shooting. She stayed at home, did dance and music practice , watered the plants, cooked her spaghetti and finished her snooze. Then what? Saif was made to feel a constant anxiety for being the more successful busy and in-demand partner in the marriage.Celebrity marriages last only when one of the pair decides to take the backseat. Arbaaz Khan doesn't mind if his wife is the head-turner between the two of them. On the contrary he encourages her to go out there and make her presence felt while he stays at home to play with their son. No wonder the Arbaaz-Malaika marriage has lasted longer than most filmdom alliances. Open and forthright Mumtaz, one of the hottest and most underrated star-actresses of Indian cinema, admits her marriage is about compromises. Diamond merchant Mayur Madhvani plonked her in the lap of luxury. Mumtaz who in any case, was tired of working since the age of 12, happily snuggled into it. But then…ennui struck. The same happened with the gorgeous Dimple. Each time the superstar Rajesh Khanna and she quarreled she apparently reminded him of the post-Bobby career she threw away for his sake.I wonder if Madhuri Dixit ever throws in her voluntarily aborted career each time she fights with Dr Nene!The ravishing Raakhee Gulzar was clearly told she had to choose between a career and marriage. She chose Yash Chopra's Kabhi Kabhie.Today Jaya is dermined to see the Ash-Abhishek marriage hit all the high spots without the wife having to make any work sacrifices.This is one marriage which is going to work. Among the two, who would feel more threatened by the other's super-stardom? It's hard to say.
courtesy:Mumbai Mirror